Writing feeds my soul in ways beyond words. It's how I keep my inner child alive. Until I came down with this virus, I didn't realize I had been taking a blessing for granted. The same was true for the rest of my creative pursuits: dancing, singing, knitting, baking...The list goes on and on. Sadly, I didn't have enough energy to do any of the things I loved to do. Nothing prepared me for the heavy exhaustion and constant pain. Some days were better than others. I was grateful for the better days.
It was a hot and humid morning in early August. The East Coast was experiencing the heatwave of heatwaves. I remember lying on my back in bed, with my journal pressed to my chest, wishing I could write something, anything. For years, writing was how I had welcomed each day. Now, holding a pen between my fingers for more than a few minutes was a major challenge. I was incredibly upset because I couldn't understand why this was happening to me. Inching my way to the center of my bed, I positioned myself under the rotating ceiling fan. Then, I closed my eyes, pretending that a cool breeze was blowing through the window. I breathed slowly and deeply, hoping to ease the pain. It didn't work, so I initiated a healing session with my Guides.
"OK, Everybody," I whispered. "I hope you're all here because I need all the help I can get right now."
We are here. How can we help you, Dear One?
"The pain is unbearable, and all I want to do is sleep. But I can't sleep because of the pain. This must mean something. Why is this happening to me?"
Let's start with the pain, Love. Describe how it feels.
"I have never experienced anything like this before. I don't know how to describe it."
Don't think. Just breathe and let the words flow.
"OK...It feels like I'm getting stung repeatedly by a swarm of bees, on top of a really bad sunburn. And, at the same time, my body hurts as if it had been beaten with a stick."
Breathe, breathe, breathe...
"Thank you for that."
What emotions are you experiencing as you breathe through the pain?
"Can I skip this part?"
This is the most important part.
"I'm feeling so many painful emotions at once: anger, confusion, frustration, sadness...
"I feel out of control, like I'm losing my mind."
You say that like it's a bad thing.
"What's good about it?"
"Please enlighten me."
You have been praying for a miracle, Dear One. What if we told you that this is the miracle you have been praying for.
To be continued...